my husband's demands

my husband wants sex a lot. actually i'm not opposed to it because i like sex too. here is the problem. when we are not being intimate, we hardly relate at all. he ignores me or just goes about his activities with little desire for input from me. but when the lights turn off he turns on. i've tried to talk with him about how a woman likes to feel connected emotionally for sex to be best but i honestly think he doesn't get it. my delimma is that if i keep pressing the point he'll get mad ,but if i never address the matter i'll get mad. not a very good choice, is it.